Blog: Superwoman's Demise The other day a friend called and exclaimed how exhausted she was. As her scenario unfolded, she was fatigued of work, family, obligations, responsibilities, and even social activities. Hortense was just plain tired. As we conversed, I heard a repeated phrase, I can’t do anything about it. It became apparent that Hortense’s fatigue related to feeling out of control. She had exaggerated her responsibilities and placed unrealistic demands on herself. Hortense placed herself in charge of everyone’s happiness, feelings of worth and success (except her own, of course). This over dramatization increased her obligations to others, her inability to fulfill these requirements, and exacerbated her guilt. Superman would have buckled under these demands and would most likely have hung up his cape in the attempt to meet them. Hortense’s exhaustion was the result of setting impossible demands and expectations for herself. Do you do the same? Ask yourself, What can I control? Answering this question honestly can dramatically change ones perception of responsibility. Filling your life with meaningless obligation complicates things. It results in no time for activities and relationships that add value, depth and meaning. Trying to make other people happy is psychological arm-twisting. The smiles produced are superficial and have no lasting value. You can’t MAKE someone happy any more than someone can MAKE you happy. Happiness is a choice. You are the one in control of your state of happiness as others are in control of theirs. Doing things that encourages feeling good, useful, accomplished, and fulfilled, produces happiness. These behaviors further set an example of practical responsibility for others. People learn to cause their own good feelings; they model the same; and the word spreads. As each person chooses to be in charge of his own happiness, instead of waiting for someone else to supply it, a relationship weight is lifted, and, Walla! You feel energized. Plus, with this burden gone, relationships have a greater chance of being healthy! Enjoy! Much love, Jean My books will change your life: Set Yourself Free: Live the Life YOU were meant to live! Be Outrageous: Do the Impossible - Others have and you can too! Dreams and the Symbology of Life! All are available on Amazon.com