It Never Hurts to Ask! Have you ever blocked yourself from going for what you really desired because it seemed too outrageous to attempt? Or has the fear of looking stupid, even though the opportunity was ripe, kept you from asking for what you wanted? If so, keep reading. There is an inventive fifth grade-writing teacher in Michigan who has helped his students get over these hurdles early in life. One of his class assignments is to write to local businesses and make “outlandish” requests. The teacher’s primary intention in making this assignment is to encourage students to make letter-writing fun. So, in addition to making the outlandish request, his students are to tell something personal about themselves and explain their project. The strange and interesting thing is that the kids usually get what they have asked for. Some of the requests from businesses that have been granted include a month’s supply of chocolate milk and a lifetime supply of french-fries. Don't you just love the creativity of this teacher and the fun the kids must have had as they received the answers to their requests? Wouldn't it be amazing if they decided to take this assignment into their lives - for the rest of their lives? Thus besides providing the students with an inventive, fun writing assignment, the teacher contributes hands-on experience in one of life’s important lessons. That no matter how outrageous you might perceive your wishes to be, you might as well ask as you just might receive the very thing you desire. It never hurts to ask! Is there anything you need to ask for right now?

What to do about worry? There are many thoughts regarding worry. Some people think that if I love you, then mustI worry about you. The truth is that if I think of you and worry, I am sending negative thought/energy your way. That doesn't necessarily jive with love. As a matter of fact, love is at the opposite end of the spectrum from worry. You can actually feel the difference. Think of something you worry about and notice the reaction in your body. The feeling that goes with worry is tightness, stress, darkness, gloom. Now, consider the idea of love (think of someone or thing you love) and feel what happens in your body. You will notice a completely different reaction. The body feels light, open, happy. That is probably the kind of energy you want to send to someone you feel good about. So why is it then that there is so much worry in the world? My own thought on this is that in our fear-based world, we tend to live externally. In other words, we let our five senses - sight, smell, sound, feel, taste tell us what is going on. Yet the truth is that our senses only relay a tiny amount of what is happening. If we were to reverse our attention and go inside - into our inner world - we could feel and sense a much broader reality. There is continuous energy moving in literally every sector of our lives. In fact, nothing is static - it is all changing. The problem is that we don't know the direction it is headed and until you develop some faith in the goodness (love) of the Universe, it is easy to revert back to fear. You see, we believe we have to know what is happening, where it is headed, and what will be the outcome. This is the way a fear-based mind thinks. Actually, you don't need to know these things. Consider this, the seasons come and go in perfect timing and order one unto the next. The night turns to day and day to night without any direction from you. The stars shine and the planets circle the earth in lovely symetry. Every tree knows how to products thousands of leaves. You can worry about these things, but nothing will change if you do. So, what would happen if you decide, I'm not going to worry and when my mind wants to go that way, I will get busy and do something. Any kind of task will work to redirect your mind. Another way to adjust your attention is to go into gratitude. All of us have tons of things to be grateful for - our homes, friends, food, clothing, sunshine, trees, etcetera. It goes on and on. The mind cannot hold gratitude (which is love) and fear (worry) at the same time. So in redirecting to gratitude, you have shifted your energy. You do have control of your mind, so take it. In Dale Carnegie's book, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, he quotes George Bernard Shaw, who summed it all up when he said: 'The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not.' So don't bother to think about it! Get busy. Your blood will circulate and your imagination will start ticking and there will be a positive upsurge of life in your body. Get busy Keep busy. _____________________________

Blog: Yes You Can, Laugh Yourself to Health Did you know that laughing has a healing effect on the body? People have overcome serious illness through the use of comedy. Laughing at old Jerry Lewis flicks or Austin Powers allows tension, depression and suppressed negativity associated with the past to be released, at least temporarily. Humor lets you see another side of life, form a new perspective. You let go of heaviness, intensity, smallness, anything that contracts or restricts you.. You may even reach the point of laughing at yourself. Every situation has a humorous side. Become an observer of life. Do you own laugh therapy. Stand back and instead of looking at how bad things are, train yourself to see absurdity. Observe the way people manipulate each other, rationalize, blame or get carried away with details missing the point. You have no control over others’ actions, and they surely bear the consequences of them, so you may as well notice and enjoy. Try to see a bigger picture of life. What is really happening? Keeping the purpose of an event in mind allows you to recognize silly actions or reactions – even your own. Enjoying life, keeps you healthy. How many happy people have you seen with serious illnesses? I’m not referring to clowns who crack jokes to cover insecure egos but well-adjusted individuals who don’t go off the deep end over inconsequential concerns, they maintain perspective, and play life as a game. Laughter and joy are health-producing stimulants. Joy increases circulation; laughter shakes your body, loosening and soothing tense nerves and muscles. Fun allows body parts to return to their natural rhythm and functioning capabilities. There is no muscular resistance to inhibit natural flows and processes. Don’t make your therapy a one-shot deal, but a way of life. I wonder when the next comedic movie plays?

Blog: Hitting the Mark In ancient times an archer would practice shooting arrows at a target. His servant’s job, while fetching the spent arrows, was to ascertain the accuracy of his master’s aim. If the target was missed, the servant called to the archer, “sin”, which meant, he missed his mark. That is how the word “sin” came into beingo Today we use “sin” in other ways. Often it is used to condemn ourselves for failure that amounts only to inexperience. We miss our mark because of lack of knowledge, practice, expertise. As experience is gained, hitting the target or achieving the goal gets easier. Example, when you first drove a car, you were awkward and clumsy. It was hard to remember and perform functions with grace and fluidity. With practice, driving became easy – automatic. If you had condemned yourself for awkwardness while learning, expertise would have come slowly amidst many bad feelings. But viewing the process as an opportunity to learn opens the mind to objectivity and optimism. We tend to view mistakes as sins and judge them terrible, rather than inexperience. We expect perfect results immediately, instead of seeing that expertise comes with practice and determination. When a rocket is shot, radar determines whether it hit or missed its target. If the rocket misses, adjustments are made to correct the next one’s path. The goal and ultimate result is contact with the target. We can view our journey through life the same way. Corrections must be made. Perhaps daily. We may also choose a different target. Eventually we arrive at our destination. Making adjustments objectively, without condemnation, encourages progress. Criticizing yourself impedes it. Apply this principle to learning any new skill – cooking, accounting, communication, golf, investments, relating to people. Each area requires practice. With practice comes success. Are you hitting your mark? Are you enjoying your journey?

Start with Belief by Jean Walters Years ago, the St. Louis Zoo was one of the first zoos to take animals out of cages and put them in big pits. They started with the bears. A visitor noted a big polar bear pacing rhythmically forward twenty feet and then backing up twenty feet, then repeating the action again and again. The visitor inquired of the zoo keeper, “Why does the bear pace back and forth in that small area, when it has a great big pit to move about in?” The keeper replied, “He has the Small Cage Habit. This animal was born and raised in captivity in a twenty-foot cage. He got his exercise by pacing forward and back in the cage. So, even though he was moved to a much larger area, he continues to exercise by pacing twenty feet forward and back.” Many people have the Small Cage Habit. They can be surrounded with possibilities, ideas, innovation, but continue to do the things the same tired, old way, not bothering to familiarize themselves with new, better methods. But they have good reasons, “I’ve always done it this way”, “I am comfortable with this method”, “I don’t know how to do it another way”. These are all ways of saying, I have the Small Cage Habit and I am not interested in growing or exploring the world of possibilities.” Do you have the Small Cage Habit? In your life lessons, you are challenged to try new things and explore the unknown. Many people resist change in the same way that the bears do. They are intimidated by expansion and newness (just like the bears are unable to move throughout a new, larger area) and hold to the old, believing that it provides stability. Growth demands new ways, new ideas, new thinking, and new methods. Today I spoke to a woman who works in finance. Because she has expanded her consciousness, she is now shifting her work to larger, wealthier, more progressive clients and businesses. She has moved from small-minded (victim-type) people to those who see and operate from a bigger picture. This would not be happening if she had not grown and expanded her own mind-set. Some would say that Personal and Spiritual growth is frivolous, but this client defies that reasoning. Thus the question to you is: Are you operating from the Small Cage Habit or from an expanded understanding of the possibilities? Are you ready to step into the unknown and expand your potential or are you trying to be safe in your old ways? The Universe provides opportunities. It is up to each of us to go for it. As you confront your fears and do it anyway; as you open yourself to new ways and opportunities; and as you move forward with determination, you can connect to a bigger picture and expand your energy. Personal transformation is subtle, yet dynamic. At some point you no longer want to hang out with negative people, or expose yourself to negative media bombardment that takes place daily. At this point, life takes on a different quality – grandeur, if you will. You will no longer be willing to hold yourself back or accept lack as your reality. These are signs of growth. Watch for them and as they occur, realize that the Universe is speaking to you. It is good! I follow with a short story about two brothers who wanted to expand to a new life and had the guts and determination to keep at it until they succeeded. The brothers are Ben and Dan Newmark of Ladue, Missouri who believed that they had the audacity and talent to develop careers in the film industry. It began with Ben deciding “if no one would hire me as an actor (in Hollywood), if I can’t even get a meeting, let alone an audition, I’ll write my own TV series.” And, that is what he did. Ben started by recruiting his brother, Dan. Together they churned out a script for a comedy-drama about the young inhabitants of a quirky Los Angeles apartment house. They followed this effort by shooting a pilot called “The Wilton Hilton.” In nine days, using digital video and casting their friends as characters, they completed their movie. What came next was lots of rejection and advice to “get out of the business.” Undaunted and dedicated to having what they wanted, the Newmarks connected with director, Lee Krieger and shot a 45 minute comedy. Then they hit another pivotal, “Now what?” Again, more negative advice, “dump it in the waste can;” “Don’t screen it; it would be career suicide.” So, of course the brothers, believing in the power of possibility, and determined to get out of the Small Cage Habit, did the opposite. They rented a theatre, filled the place with friends and sent postcard invitations to Hollywood insiders – mostly assistants to agents and producers. The result: three trainees from the mailroom at Creative Artists Agency, one of Hollywood’s top talent agencies, took their film back and showed it to the big guys, who loved it. Voila! They were signed! Ultimately the brothers pitched their idea to the CW network and a new television series, “The Wilton” was born. Determination to expand their skills and talents and to meet the challenges proved to be motivating to the Newmark brothers. It caused them to increase their creativity, imagination, and determination. This is what entering the field of possibilities can do for you too. If you have had the Small Cage Habit, break through it by considering what opportunities have appeared to you lately? Is there potential for new methods, new relationships, markets, or clients? You can accelerate your expansion by doing things differently. Here are some suggestions: Drive to your destinations using different routes. Go a new way daily. Select an unfamiliar entrée the next time you go to a restaurant. Choose a new spot for vacation. Strive for newness – a new color, pattern or style in your clothes or décor. Rent or purchase an unusual model car or vehicle. Try a new hair-do. (When women change their hair, you know they are serious about change.) Take lessons – clowning, dancing, painting, or Tai Chi. Be bold! There are no limits in the Universe. Test this theory to discover its truth. Stay open to possibilities. If you catch yourself saying “No,” rethink that choice. Learn to say, “Yes, I’ll give it a try.” The only person that can get in your way in life is YOU. Watch out for comfort. Many think that the way to go is to be comfortable. I will tell you that comfort is your enemy. It keeps you from growing. As you say, “Yes,” to the possibilities, you make yourself strong. In time your willingness grows and you become undaunted. Soon you realize that you can accomplish anything, and that means you are operating from your vast spiritual self. It is the process that is important for it is what educates you as to who you really are. As you engage in the process, you discover that you really are connected to something greater than yourself. Here is an activity to internalize this principle Consider opportunities that have appeared in your life of late. It could be new relationships or social settings, new groups with which to get involved, new business concepts or work, education to expand your skills, opportunities to give more fully. Life is filled with a vast array of opportunities to help you expand. List some of these ideas on a sheet of paper. Now, choose one opportunity and decide how to get started. The idea here is to discover a new, expanded self and release the Small Cage Habit. The only way that can happen is with new methods or activities. Next, take action on your idea. Get started. Do this within the next 24 hours. Do this without concern for the outcome. Step into the field of possibilities. If you haven’t determined this next step, seed your mind by expanding in smaller ways as stated above: drive a new route to work and shopping, venture to new locations for restaurants, entertainment, shopping. Try new entrees, or cook different recipes. Venture into the unknown. Explore the possibilities. Have some fun!!

How to inspire and empower others to be their BEST SELVES Do you remember psychologist, Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs? It is a list of human needs that stack from the bottom up. The bottom or lowest layer of needs include health, food and sleep and the next level up is safety and shelter. Then comes belonging (the need for people or groups with which to feel connected.) Then as we move to the upper layer, we find the need for esteem (to esteem self and receive esteem from others) and above that the next ladder rung is Self Actualization. This top level of Maslow’s ladder of needs (self-actualization) is where a person’s psychological needs have been met so that he is free to understand more fully who he is and to make an impact on the world, to really be their best selves. . As we aspire to optimize our experience of self, we begin to have “peak experiences” or moments of extreme happiness, high performance, or bliss. It is when we feel most successful and operate at our full potential. Maslow arrived at this hierarchy of needs by studying happy, healthy people – from regular folks to high achievers, like Albert Einstein. His quest was to understand how they were able to achieve happiness and success in their lives. This same quest has always intrigued me. As a child I would read every biography and autobiography available with one question in mind, how did this person know he/she could accomplish what he did? Be it Paul Revere riding through villages to warn people that the “British were coming,” or becoming president of the United States or leading a troop of soldiers in war, in each case it seemed that there was a spirit in the individual that spoke to them and drove them to take the lead and do more. I believe we all have this Spirit and perhaps it isn’t about forcing ourselves to perform, but developing the self esteem and confidence to open to the opportunities we face and release our creativity, talents and potential, to really desire to be our best selves. I believe that each opportunity we face in life is part of this progression – each one brings us closer to living our full potential and having peak experiences. So what if our real “work” is to assist others to actualize in every area of life - as a parent, teacher, boss? To really help each one realize that they have greatness within and the capacity to rise above their challenges and do great things? Maybe we are to create situations where folks can develop their talents and potential. Often as parents and perhaps as co-workers and employers, we want to make it easy for people and we do the work for them. So when we do this, are we really supporting and believing in the ones we are there to help? Sometimes we even call it love when we take care of things that others need to do for them selves. In actuality we are stealing from them. We are demonstrating our greatness, but not letting them express theirs! So what is the message today? It is really a challenge…. How can we encourage others to be their best selves and in the process, become our own best selves? Think of it this way… are you doing something for someone who needs to do it for themselves…. because if you are, you are denying them the opportunity to develop and express their talents and creativity. Maslow’s insights into personal psychology may offer the challenge we all need. What if my job isn’t about coercing performance, but encouraging people to rise to their full potential? What if my job is to believe that each person has it in them to be great? If that is so, then let’s begin with ourselves by meeting whatever challenge is in front of you, and, as you do that you encourage each person in your world to do the same. Let’s make a practice of studying healthy attitudes and asking ourselves, “How can I be like that?” In this way we move to self actualize and maybe help the world be a more exciting, rewarding place as well.

How to be an Eagle! Have you heard about the eagle that was inadvertently raised on a turkey farm? Although in most ways, it was a nice existence. Turkeys, you see, took things pretty easy. The problem was the eagle had aspirations that the turkeys did not. In a nutshell the eagle wanted to fly – and not just above the earth – he wanted to fly HIGH! And he was curious. What is over that hill? What is the world like beyond the farmyard? Why does the sky change colors from morning to night? What causes the leaves to fall from the trees? “ The problem is that when you are an eagle on a turkey farm, it is clear you are different. Now, that could be okay, but in this case, this eagle stood out. The turkeys were happy pecking around looking for grain, whereas he was head to the skies, dreaming of flying. Even when he tried to conform, he felt weird and awkward. The turkeys must have thought so too because they would stop and gawk at him. It clearly wasn’t working. You know how it is - dreamers are often laughed at by those who won’t let their minds run free! As it happens, one day the eagle was mesmerized watching a family of robins in a near by tree. The babies would jump from the side of the nest to the center and practice flapping their wings. Soon their wings were strong and they would jump from the nest and fly around the tree. Okay, that was his break. He practiced jumping from a bale of hay and running while he pumped his wings. As he ran, he could feel the wind taking hold of his wings. As his body grew and his wings expanded, he could feel himself lifted right off the ground. It’s wonderful, it’s beautiful; I’m free. After that he was never the same. He never felt bad about being different and he never allowed anyone to tell him his dreams weren’t valid. You see, within each of us is an eagle yearning to fly high above the masses. The question is: will you let yourself have your dreams? Or will you let other people’s limitations become your own? What is your inner yearning? What are you willing to do to manifest it? From one eagle to another, I wish you an elevated life, soaring above the crowds, and having a fabulous life. Here’s the deal, once you accept your dreams as your destiny, your mind will begin to show you the steps to get there, just as the eagle found his teacher through a group of robins, you will find your mentors. Once you make up your mind that you are not here to peck around in ordinariness, you will find your way. May you fly HIGH!!!